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A long wishlist: Reflecting seven years later

Seven years ago, I blogged about a long wish list ( link ) penning down many of my desires at the time. Lot has passed in my life and in world since (one word - COVID!) - I'm on the other side of 30 now and a mother of twin girls! One of the reasons why I love to blog, is that it is very interesting to look back and reflect on what we've written about. I'm now revisiting this wish list for fun, to see what has changed, in another long post, be warned :)  The ones that I can tick: 1) Writing a poem for my special person: I ended up doing it the same year as his birthday present - Here is the link if you're curious to read :) What's special is I still stand by it and my feelings haven't changed, which is something I'm very grateful for. 2) Learning music: With the constant narrative that all cool things in life end at 30, and especially after becoming a mother, I would have never imagined that I would start learning singing (Carnatic music) again after giving
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New year resolutions - To 2022

Happy new year everyone! 2021 has been a year full of coping with uncertainties, tragedies, and changes. Looking ahead,  I am hoping 2022 will give us all the much-needed stability and peace of mind, and put an end to this pandemic. These are my resolutions gearing up for 2022: 1. Inculcating a sense of discipline:  Generally a very popular new resolution throughout years for many people, I am fairly certain it is one of the hardest ones to follow through on. But the timing for this year makes it even more popular than usual I suspect, because in 2021, we had to do a lot of 'going with the flow' with things beyond our control. The coping mechanisms for this naturally had a lot to do with being flexible and less 'plan-centric'. But in my case at least, this may have gone to the other extreme, which means no emphasis on being organised and having specific targets. Of course, there is some merit to the type-A approach of 'to-do-lists', plans and routines, so I want

Bringing a pinch of positivity to life - Coping with COVID stress

In these times of overwhelming stress with many we know suffering, it is very hard to stay positive and not 'languish' - That's the new term for what we have been feeling often in this pandemic. These are a few things that helped me cope with stress to some extent, and hope they work for you too. 1. Walk / exercise: Any dedicated and continuous physical activity for 30-60 mins helps release endorphins, which make us feel good. So taking a walk even within your building or terrace gives the much-needed refresher to let our mind bring focus to important things and not languish. 2. Gratitude journal:  This is often advised by therapists to bring positivity to life. It is simply to make a note (physical or digital) of all 10 things you feel grateful for, or happy about in life, however bad the situation is, every once in 4-5 days. It's hard in this situation to come up with that list: They could even be very simple things like not being sick or having a home to live in, or

Living the nightmare: COVID second wave in India

Four months ago, we celebrated the arrival of the new year 2021 with new zeal and freedom. We just emerged from what felt like a horror story. We thought we could renew and recelebrate life. It feels like a distant past now. Movies, street food, and family gatherings are from a different era. Today, as we live this nightmare, it is very difficult to put to words what we are going through. The horror of the first wave seems meek in comparison. Although my heart goes out to all those who lost lives and livelihoods from it. We are awake at night troubled by reality. We are scared to wake up in the morning to discover how much it has worsened. If we are lucky enough to survive or to be safe, we count our blessings every hour. We worry about the future, friends, family, and dear ones. If we are unfortunate to go through the loss of a loved one, I cannot even attempt to assume what one goes through. We pray. We hope. And with incredible spirit, we try to carry on with our lives. We don't

Where does gender bias start?

Sharing my experiences as a mother of three-year-old twin girls to show how dominating the effect of social conditioning is on us and how difficult it is to eliminate it as it is so unconscious. I want to drive home the point that women (or any oppressed group) do have an uphill task to fight against their own and everyone else's conditioning to break the stereotype. This also shows how skewed a lot of our available art and literature is in terms of gendered roles: 1. While narrating a very innocent story to my kids about a mother leaving her daughter at home for work, I had to narrate a scene where the child's grand-dad fries papads for lunch. And my daughter's very innocent question with the look of surprise on her face is enough to say it all - "Do grandpas fry papads ?" She hasn't seen men cook and the implication of that hit me hard. Equality begins at home, and it cannot be emphasized enough. Gendered roles in parenting are unhealthy and damaging for ch

Rounding up 2020; Easing into 2021

2020 is incredibly hard to describe for anyone. It is like we were somehow jolted into an alternate reality that we didn't know existed. I am aware it must have an extremely stressful year for many who had to cope with sweeping changes, financial difficulties, health issues, and loss of near and dear ones. Praying for the souls of those who lost their lives and hopeful that 2021 gives us the strength to face what lies ahead. What 2020 was for me: My 2020 has thankfully not been as stressful as many, and I have much to be grateful for. While it was a rollercoaster, the entire year had so many phases to it, each giving a new perspective to life. In 2019, I had no idea that I would have soon started my MBA at London Business School in the middle of a pandemic, moved out of Mumbai shuttling between cities and continents, lived in a joint family / back-to-student-flatmate life, started cooking among other things.  There was initially the 'Zen' phase at work where I knew I needed

A Suitable Boy and polarisation under the pretext of protection

So SRK can pee in a church in DDLJ. Nobody gets offended. Minor girl can be raped in a temple . Nobody gets offended. Come to think of it - Hrithik Roshan was romancing near Haji Ali in Fiza, and nobody got offended. But Hindu woman kissing a Muslim boy in a temple on-screen. THAT'S offensive! Never mind the scores of college kids who make out in empty temples anyway. Reality does not matter. If someone says it is offensive on a whim, it is! You see - it is very easy to be outraged in India for all sorts of illogical reasons. You can be outraged over someone eating beef, you can be outraged over someone kissing someone else, you can be outraged over someone writing a book, you can be outraged over a great many things. Unfortunately, when it comes to the real test where you expect outrage, that is where this country remains mute, like when a rape-victim is burnt alive in police custody on her way to testify in court. THAT can be forgotten, in fact, it's hardly noticed, if at a